Vafa opening a bottle of champagne celebrating graduation obtaining NLP coaching diploma from UKCPD

Get The Life You Wish For

“Get The Life You Wish For”…  I so often heard the voice inside my head say this phrase.  Especially when I came face to face with situations that put me at a cross roads where my values were being tested.  Then I came across this passage from Daring Greatly by Brene Brown.

 

 “The cave you fear to enter holds the treasures you seek.  Own the fear, find the cave and write a new inning for yourself. For the people you’re meant to serve and support and for your culture.  Choose courage over comfort, choose whole hearts over armour and choose the great adventure of being brave and afraid at the exact same time.” 

 

If you’re looking for what’s missing in your life or in need of new direction, if you’re defined by the measures of success that someone else has imposed on you or if you’re feeling guilty for wanting more, then please know you’re one of many who think and feel this way.

What are you doing to get the life you wish for?

I was reflecting on the time I used to wish for a better life during a graduation ceremony with a difference and congratulated myself for stepping inside the cave even though it was scary, unknown and uncomfortable.

For choosing whole hearts instead of armour, even though it deprived me from aspects of my old, secure world; and for choosing courage over comfort which scares me and makes me feel very alive every day!

Are you feeling stuck or are you living a life that makes you feel alive?

We only get one life; let’s live it on our terms

 

Love and strong coffee

Vafa

Do Something That Scares You!

 

“May your choice reflect your hopes and not your fears” Nelson Mandela

 

How often do you do something that scares you?  How often do you make decisions that reflect your hopes, your heart’s desires and your dreams, rather than let the fear of change paralyse your thinking and reasoning powers?

I’ve made so many difficult decisions in the last few years.  Most of which have led to a huge personal & professional development.  Some decisions haven’t been great, but even those have provided ample experiences and lessons without which I wouldn’t be who I am now.

If you don’t try, you won’t know the magic that’s within your reach, and yet so many choose to tolerate the devil they know for the fear of upsetting the status quo which doesn’t serve them well anyway! It’s keeping them stuck, unfulfilled and unhappy. Crazy, right?

Their narrative is: ‘One DAY I’ll get the life I deserve’. To which I reply: ‘would today be a good day to start?’

I love walking alongside people who are brave enough to let go of their fear and embrace change to learn, to grow and to find the magic. Do you know anyone like that?

Fun fact… Going to a music festival by myself was so outside of my comfort zone, but I decided to do it a year ago today & I loved it! I’d be there now if it wasn’t for 2020 throwing us a curved ball!

What are you choosing that reflects your hopes, not your fears?  We only get one life.  Let’s live the life we want and deserve, starting from today

Next time you want to do something that scares you a little, perhaps when you’d like someone to walk alongside you, give me a call

 

Love and strong coffee

Vafa

How Do You Colour?

 

“Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life’s coming attractions.”

Albert Einstein

When was the last time you coloured outside the lines?   I mean, when was the last time you pushed outside of your comfortable boundaries?

I’ve been colouring outside the lines for a number of years now.  It all started when I began to challenge my beliefs and values that were deeply ingrained.

And when lockdown was imposed, I wanted to stay connected with my network.  So I decided to become visible on social media and started doing videos.  Something I had shied away from, partly because of my limiting beliefs of not being able to do a good enough job!

Not only I’ve grown used to sharing my views on video, I’ve been able to help many people who contacted me.   I’ve also been invited on fb and IG lives to share insights.  So, I’d say that I’ve fulfilled my purpose of providing a safe space for my audience to talk and make sense of their stories.   It just goes to show that good stuff happen when you step outside your comfort zone.  

I often challenge my clients on their limiting beliefs by asking them to “imagine” how they would be if they were less afraid?  It’s only by exploring different experiences that we build new habits.  Who knows what great opportunities you may stumble upon if you chose to be different!

So I’m curious; how are you building new habits during these times?

What have you done differently that you couldn’t imagine doing before lockdown, and how have you felt about your new experiences?

 

Love and strong coffee

Vafa

What’s Your Story?

 

“Step aside from all thinking, and there is nowhere you can’t go.” Seng-ts’an

So, I’m saying a cheerful Hi to my wonderful and diverse network at a time we’re being challenged in ways we’ve never known before!

At the time of writing this blog, we’re faced with a global pandemic and by now, have had at least two weeks of “trying” to make sense of our new reality, but are we there yet?

In an attempt to stay connected when we’re having to socially distance from each other, I’m starting a new vlog series. Something that I’m not hugely comfortable with, but to grow, one needs to step outside one’s comfort zone, right? 😉

Also, I’m being driven by a bigger purpose of providing a safe space for my audience to voice their fears and concerns. To stay connected and optimistic. My purpose in producing this vlog is to give you a chance to voice “your story” regardless of the camp you fall into and see how you wish to be supported.

This post is inspired by one of my favourite authors, Brene Brown. When she’s in conflict with her husband, she starts her dialogue by “my story is…”

This allows her the opportunity to be open and honest about how her thoughts are creating certain feelings about a particular situation, and how she’s narrating “her story”. She’ll often find that her husband has given a different meaning to the course of events, and therefore “his story” is different.

Proof that we interpret the same situation differently, according to our preferences, our installed filters and previous experiences which have shaped us as we are. By respectfully listening to each other’s stories, we feel seen, heard and understood. In that safe environment, we get a sense of connection, acceptance and belonging. We get to strategise and think of solutions to our problems.

So, what’s your story? Are you panic stricken, slightly anxious, heavy hearted, fear the unknown, bored because you’ve been furloughed and feel lost, or have you made peace with your new reality and are getting on with it?  Or something entirely different?  There are no right or wrong answers by the way.  How you’re feeling at the moment is very real to you and you deserve to be believed.

Are you half full or half empty?  What are your thoughts and what are the emotions and stories you’re attaching to those thought? What’s your story?  Let’s talk and make sense of this madness together…

 

Love and strong coffee
Vafa