Zigzag Trail Of Life

“We must be willing to let go of the life we’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”

Joseph Campbell

I came across this zigzag trail of beautifully hand painted stones on my walk earlier today. It depicted the path I’ve travelled on for the last few years. When I decided to throw myself into being an explorer whole-heartedly, I didn’t realise how many zigzags I’d face!

There were times when I faced so many obstacles that all I wanted to do was to hibernate like my favourite creatures, the hedgehogs. But that wasn’t an option. I had stepped beyond the point of no return and there was no looking back. And I soon learned that the more challenges I took on, the easier the decision to take more challenges became. It was as if I was building a new muscle I didn’t know I had!

Every time I faced another puzzle on my zigzag trail and decided to tackle it like my life depended on it, I found a hidden strength or a forgotten resource I hadn’t thought of before. Very often, a new mentor appeared on my path; literally from nowhere!

I persevered until I found my new path. My current reality. A reality that’s aligned with who I am, what I stand for and what I won’t tolerate. A reality that’s congruent to my core values.

And I found myself being the mentor for a younger version of me today. Someone who described what he was experiencing, and he took me back a few years. He showed vulnerability in sharing his story and found someone who’d been there. Exactly what I did back when I became an explorer. Who knows who this young man will inspire and mentor a few years down the line?

When the status quo isn’t leaving you fulfilled, what do you do?

When the call to adventure comes, you have two options:

💥You either choose courage and follow that call. When you do, you will connect with who you really are and what you stand for. You will sense a kind of ease and freedom in living your everyday life. You will become a better version of yourself and become more attractive inside and out.

💥Or you choose comfort and conformity and numb the pain by finding distractions in the form of work, food, alcohol and material possessions. You can be sure that you’re doing exactly as others want you to, and that you’re pleasing everyone else, but yourself.

If you choose courage, be warned! The path to finding fulfilment is not a straight one!

Finding this path isn’t for the faint hearted! Only enter if you’re willing to:

become an explorer
have your deep-rooted beliefs challenged
step outside your comfort zone
let go of certainty
trust your intuition
get out of your head and reconnect with your body
have the courage to let go of your perceived security which in-fact is keeping you stuck!
And most importantly…. Enter this path only if you trust yourself and are willing to trust the process…

If you’re wondering about the process, reach out and I’ll explain.

Love and strong coffee

Vafa x

You’re Never Too Old To Dream

“If you can dream it, you can do it.” Walt Disney

I Found this beautiful stone amongst hundreds laid out on my walk today and I thought of the e-mail I received from a client recently.

“Thank you for helping me give myself permission to dream again” he wrote.

The email gave me a warm fuzzy feeling on one level! It reiterated the reasons I love doing what I do.

It also saddened me… At exactly what point in our life, do we remove the permission for ourselves to dream?

Have you ever considered how much of a more free and fulfilled life you would lead if you believed in your dreams and took steps towards fulfilling them?

What sort of a message are you sending your children when you tolerate a mediocre existence and regularly sacrifice on who you want to be and how you’d like to live?

Yes; trust me… they know how you show up! They’re more perceptive than you give them credit for!

Please remember, you’re never too old to dream new dreams…

Just imagine… What would it mean to you to live the life of your dreams?

Curious to explore this further?

Call me if you like my style, and if not, there are plenty more coaches out there whom you may like better.

But please invest time in yourself and pursue your dreams. Because when you do, it’s a different kinda life you’ll be leading. You only get one life and it so deserves to be lived well

Love and strong coffee

Vafa x

Trust The Magic Of Beginnings

“And suddenly you know: It’s time to start something new and trust the magic of beginnings.” Meister Eckhart

I shared this post on our Mind Superheroes facebook page yesterday.

I was delighted to receive quite a few private messages. A few friends and associates texted to say how the post inspired them to start new projects!

It was the first proper day back to work for me yesterday. I had a few scheduled calls with clients and my business community.

In every conversation, I sensed ‘HOPE’ for a new beginning. The new year does that to us. We get a new lease of life! We get a chance to start over and become WHO WE WANT TO BE.

Although it was the first day of homeschooling for children in England. There was intent in making this year a brilliant one by their parents. I love the community I’m a part of. No matter how tough times get, we still remain optimistic. We look for what we have and what is in our power to do to thrive. We support and champion each other.

This is the beauty of surrounding ourselves with people who inspire us, not those who drain us.

One thing if for sure…

It’s been tough for most of us to have had some of our liberties removed by the events of the recent months. But our freedom will never be stripped away from us without our consent. We

are still in charge of our lives in how we respond to each event.
have full control over our thoughts and therefore our actions.
can choose our spoken words carefully. Because we know they have a direct effect on how we will feel and how we strive for results.

As always, investing in our physical and emotional well-being is key to keeping a positive mental health. Whatever that looks for you.

For me, that will include:

Staying connected with my optimistic community.
Sharing laughs, cuddles, kindness and loving gestures with mini me and the rest of the family on video calls.
Journaling the small, steady actions I’m getting to the habit of owning.
Taking my daily walks even more so, when it looks miserable out there and I don’t feel like doing it.
Listening to music to lift my mood and mummy dancing around the kitchen
Keeping hydrated.
Having a healthy diet with a sprinkling of cake to keep me sweet
And what never fails me! Read, listen and invest in personal development

NOW is a brilliant time to trust the magic of new beginnings

Take stock of what you’ve achieved in the last year and be sure to celebrate your wins.
IMAGINE where you would like to be in life and work at the end of 2021.
WRITE a letter to your future self and take yourself through that journey.
MAKE building small, consistent habits your new norm.

You’d be surprised at the magic that’ll unfold at the end of the year.

What are your plans for the upcoming year? It is your birthright to create a life of your choosing.

Reach out if you’re feeling a little wobbly and need listening ears.

Love and strong coffee

Vafa x

Do Something That Scares You!

“May your choice reflect your hopes and not your fears” Nelson Mandela

How often do you do something that scares you? How often do you make decisions that reflect your hopes, your heart’s desires and your dreams, rather than let the fear of change paralyse your thinking and reasoning powers?

I’ve made so many difficult decisions in the last few years. Most of which have led to a huge personal & professional development. Some decisions haven’t been great, but even those have provided ample experiences and lessons without which I wouldn’t be who I am now.

If you don’t try, you won’t know the magic that’s within your reach, and yet so many choose to tolerate the devil they know for the fear of upsetting the status quo which doesn’t serve them well anyway! It’s keeping them stuck, unfulfilled and unhappy. Crazy, right?

Their narrative is: ‘One DAY I’ll get the life I deserve’. To which I reply: ‘would today be a good day to start?’

I love walking alongside people who are brave enough to let go of their fear and embrace change to learn, to grow and to find the magic. Do you know anyone like that?

Fun fact… Going to a music festival by myself was so outside of my comfort zone, but I decided to do it a year ago today & I loved it! I’d be there now if it wasn’t for 2020 throwing us a curved ball!

What are you choosing that reflects your hopes, not your fears? We only get one life. Let’s live the life we want and deserve, starting from today

Next time you want to do something that scares you a little, perhaps when you’d like someone to walk alongside you, give me a call…

Love and strong coffee

Vafa

Back To School With A Difference

It’s certainly been a time of back to school with a difference. We’ve loved running workshops for parents and educators to promote healthy discussions at home. The main topics have been emotional literacy and a building a resilient mindset. The attendees have loved the story books we selected for them. Using stories to discuss difficult topics is a fun for all. Children love imagining different scenarios and pretending. It’s learning by having fun and this is what we promote in our workshops.

This story books we chose deal with so many of the negative emotions and questions children may have about school, and find difficult to articulate.

When you attend our workshops, you’ll see how we use the power of storytelling, NLP and coaching techniques to promote healthy discussions around certain fears and anxieties not only the children, but their parents and educators may be experiencing as we speak.

Starting a new school year presents challenges normally, and even more so in the current climate. Thousands of new school starters will not have had the usual transition programme full of visits and activities.

Having spoken to many parents and educators, we appreciate the adults are dealing with anxieties of their own and this can magnify children’s uncertainties around a new school year.

This may lead to additional worries which need addressing before school starts if a positive experience is to be had. Our workshops have been impactful to parents and educators so far.

When you work with us, we will use the power of storytelling, coaching and NLP techniques to foster positive mental health in children, parents and educators.

Visit our website for more upcoming workshops or contact me for more information.

Love and strong coffee

Vafa

Do You Choose Courage Or Conformity?

“Do you choose courage or conformity?” I asked myself again after another difficult conversation that left me demotivated to strive for my best. Then I remembered this passage and exhaled, attempting to calm my distressed nervous system.

“It’s not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly” T Roosevelt

This quote has been such a driver for me. Every time I thought of choosing comfort and conformity over courage in my journey of Personal Revolution…

I chose courage over comfort though; Every – Single – Day!

You know how the other quote goes. “Feel the fear and do it anyway.” And it was by sharing stories and insights with some great minds that I was inspired to push through the pain and get the life I wished for.

So now, I’m on a mission to spread the nuggets of wisdom that changed my life. I’ll be doing this by chatting to some truly inspirational people.

What’s my main purpose for starting this adventure?

To help my clients of course. They often think they’re the only ones experiencing the negative emotions and feel unfulfilled. They believe they have no other choice but to carry on as they are.

With the help of my beautiful guests, I plan to inspire you to get the courage and clarity to live life on your terms. Because I think that’s key to families and workplaces becoming happier, more connected places.

So watch out for my “Inspiring Courage” video series next week. I’m so looking forward to hearing my guests’ favourite quotes and the lessons they’ve learnt. And what the success factors were in them moving forward when they faced the same question I did time and again; “Do You Choose Courage Or Conformity?”

If you know of anyone who’d like to share their inspirational nuggets of wisdom, please drop me a line.

Love and strong coffee

Vafa

A Trip Down Memory Lane

Imagination and memory follow the same neural path.

Have you ever considered how easy it is to snap out of the loop of negative thoughts you may be experiencing? All you need to do in that moment is to CHOOSE to be different. Stand up if you’re sitting down. Look up if you have your head down. Close your eyes and bring back memories of a beautiful event.

In fact, next time you’re looking at a site that’s taking your breath away, make a picture memory. You may be at the seaside, or the mountains, or your favourite restaurant, or a friend’s wedding.

Notice what you see, hear and feel. Notice the colours, the sounds and the textures. Notice the scents and the tastes. Then when you’re in need of cheering up, recall the picture memory and the sensations associated with it. It’s magical, it really works!

Mini me and I were in Venice this time last year and fb keeps on teasing me with memories of a year ago.

Looking at the crowds in this featured picture, I’m wondering…

About how silent, even eerie the side streets and the canals in the enchanted sunken city of Venice must be, feel and look today.

How relieved the locals must feel on one hand to have their beautiful city to themselves. And yet how much of an economic struggle this must be for them on the other hand.

I’m also thinking about how I took life as I knew it for granted. The wonders of the world I was lucky enough to explore. The touch of my loved ones which I miss incredibly. The ability to jump in the car and enjoy a day at the beach. A short train ride to London to immerse myself in a few hours of culture. Even the simple pleasure of taking a trip to the local drugstore to buy hair colour and a new shade of nail polish just because… All of these and more that I had at my fingertips, I took for granted. We all did!

So today, instead of finding ourselves in another beautiful European city, mini me and I are going to look at old pictures. We will use the power of our imagination to reminisce about a life we once knew and the precious memories we made at every location. A life I hope we get back sometime soon in the future, albeit I cannot think for sure what that would look like anymore. Because I know the world we knew has changed for good, as have the people in it.

If nothing else, I’ve learnt to be more present, to look for pleasure in the pain I face and to say thank you more often… There are lessons in every adversity we face.

Happy Easter everyone

Much love, Easter eggs and strong coffee

Vafa

What’s Your Story?

“Step aside from all thinking, and there is nowhere you can’t go.” Seng-ts’an

So, I’m saying a cheerful Hi to my wonderful and diverse network at a time we’re being challenged in ways we’ve never known before!

At the time of writing this blog, we’re faced with a global pandemic and by now, have had at least two weeks of “trying” to make sense of our new reality, but are we there yet?

In an attempt to stay connected when we’re having to socially distance from each other, I’m starting a new vlog series. Something that I’m not hugely comfortable with, but to grow, one needs to step outside one’s comfort zone, right? 😉

Also, I’m being driven by a bigger purpose of providing a safe space for my audience to voice their fears and concerns. To stay connected and optimistic. My purpose in producing this vlog is to give you a chance to voice “your story” regardless of the camp you fall into and see how you wish to be supported.

This post is inspired by one of my favourite authors, Brene Brown. When she’s in conflict with her husband, she starts her dialogue by “my story is…”

This allows her the opportunity to be open and honest about how her thoughts are creating certain feelings about a particular situation, and how she’s narrating “her story”. She’ll often find that her husband has given a different meaning to the course of events, and therefore “his story” is different.

Proof that we interpret the same situation differently, according to our preferences, our installed filters and previous experiences which have shaped us as we are. By respectfully listening to each other’s stories, we feel seen, heard and understood. In that safe environment, we get a sense of connection, acceptance and belonging. We get to strategise and think of solutions to our problems.

So, what’s your story? Are you panic stricken, slightly anxious, heavy hearted, fear the unknown, bored because you’ve been furloughed and feel lost, or have you made peace with your new reality and are getting on with it? Or something entirely different? There are no right or wrong answers by the way. How you’re feeling at the moment is very real to you and you deserve to be believed.

Are you half full or half empty? What are your thoughts and what are the emotions and stories you’re attaching to those thought? What’s your story? Let’s talk and make sense of this madness together…

Love and strong coffee
Vafa

How Do You Cope In Times Of Adversity?

Happy New Year ✨🥂✨

2019 threw me so many curved balls that I now feel, I can rise in the face of adversity and win hands down. No matter what cards I’m dealt!

EVERY TIME I thought things were going my way, the universe tested my patience and resilience. But you know something? The universe forgot I was a war child and I’ve faced what many of my peers couldn’t even imagine as their worst nightmare.

I’m not saying I was ready to attack the challenges face on immediately. And I’m not saying I didn’t feel scared, hurt and angry at times. And there were times I crawled back into my shell and wished I could hibernate for a season like my favourite nocturnal creatures, the hedgehogs. But my beautiful and emotionally intelligent boy, and the undying support of my very close network of friends and family got me going. Not forgetting my gorgeous and incredibly talented accountability buddies who guided me out of the potholes I found myself in.

I decided to acknowledge the pain, rather than bury and ignore it like I used to. I found strategies around dealing with the unrest and the uncertainty. For me, this was in the form of taking long walks, reading, and having pow wows with my buddies to check my sanity. Until I found solutions to the many challenges I faced. ONE CHALLENGE AT A TIME…

I’m curious…. How do you deal with the serious, surprise life challenges that are thrown your way? Are you aware of the immense guilt and the shame you feel in those situations as I did? And do they stop you from reaching out and seeking different perspectives?

Here’s to believing in ourselves and the hidden powers within us more… In the famous words of one of my favourite poets, Hafez:

“You have in your soul, every ingredient necessary to turn your existence into joy. All you have to do is to mix your ingredients”

Love and strong coffee

Vafa