The importance of state management

The importance of state management

 
 
The importance of state management
 
 
‘State management’ is one of the first techniques I teach my clients, both the children and the adults I work with. It’s probably amongst one of the most impactful tools they take away with them.
 
 
The state you adopt and operate out of is very much governed by the thoughts you cultivate, pictures you see and the stimuli you encounter. And of course, the way you:
 
🔎 perceive these events,
🔎 interpret these events,
🔎 and respond to them.
 
 
In effect, your state is mostly governed by the ‘stories’ you tell yourself. What’s more, there’s often more than one way of narrating that story.
 
 
What my clients find impactful is the fact that the first ‘story’ doesn’t always reflect the whole truth. It’s just a ‘first draft’ which is the way you’re interpreting the events based on years of conditioning and unconscious programming. It’s highly likely there’s a different version of what they currently ‘believe’ to be the truth.
 

But wait… I have great news?!

 
Old beliefs, habits of thinking and being are learnt, not innate! They can be replaced by more resourceful beliefs, habits and ways of being when you choose to be intentional in the results you’d prefer…
 
when you choose to:
✨ live a more connected life;
✨ a more peaceful life;
✨ a life where you respectfully and responsibly impact and influence your loved ones
 
OR
 
✨ a life of less conflict and angst;
✨ a less reactive and volatile life.
 
 
So, next time you’re caught up in the cycle of overwhelm or chaos, ask yourself:
 
📚What’s the story I’m telling myself?
📚How else can I narrate this story?
 
 
Let’s connect when you’re ready for a life which is less reactive and more intentional.
You only get one life. You so deserve to get the life you wish for.
 
 
Love & Strong Coffee
 
Vafa

 

Let life live through you Leeds Castle

Let life live through you

 
 
Let life live through you
 
 
“Try not to resist the changes that come your way. Instead, let life live through you. And do not worry that your life is turning upside down. How do you know that the side you are used to is better than the one to come?” Rumi
 
 
Visiting Leeds Castle, aka ‘the loveliest castle in the world’ brought into my attention the amount of change this beautiful castle has endured in the last 900 years! And it’s still standing tall and proud.
 
 
It made me wonder… What needs to happen for more people to accept the wind of change?
 
 
We evolve as we journey through life. Our circumstances change. Our goals change. What served us in our 20s and 30s won’t necessarily serve us in our mid to late life.
 
 
And oftentimes, we find our true calling, our true direction as the wind of change sweeps through our lives.  
 
 
We have two options when that happens! To play the victim and ask ‘why me? Why is this happening to me?’ OR to remain flexible and curious and ask ‘what can I learn from this and how can I find a new direction?’  In reality, how often do you let life live through you?
 
 
That’s when working with a coach will help you generate new, positive and future focused solutions.
 
 
If you’re curious to explore working with a coach, drop me a message.
 
 
You have all the necessary ingredients inside of you to live a fulfilled life. You only get one life! It’s your birthright to get the life you wish for.
 
 
Happy Saturday everyone 🌻🌞🌻
 
 
Love & Strong Coffee
 
Vafa

 

retreat, VIP, coaching workshop, values,. identity, purpose, NLP

Reset your life

Reset your life
 
 
There’s never been a better time to step back, take stock, and reflect on your story so far.  To reset your life.  
 
 
If it’s not reading how you want it to, make a change! Seek a new perspective on life and be the author of your own story moving forwards.
 
 
The world we live in is going through a major reset! Now is the perfect time for you to reset your life too, so you create a life that’s more on your terms.
 
🔦Are you at a crossroads and can’t see the wood for the trees?
🔦Do you know in your core, that there is more to life than this?
🔦Have you ever wondered how much of your life you spend on autopilot?
🔦Have you achieved everything your idealistic self has wanted to achieve to date, and yet you feel unfulfilled?
🔦Is there a nagging voice inside of you saying, “ONE DAY I will do what I really LOVE to do?”
🔦Has the right time never come so every day feels like ground hog day?
 
 
If any of this resonates, then this luxury retreat is for you. Let’s have a conversation. Call me or drop me a message and I will call you back.
 
 
Love & Strong Coffee
 
Vafa

 

do or do not there's no try

Do, or do not…  There’s no try

 
 
Do, or do not…  There’s no try
 
 
“Procrastination is the seed of self-destruction“ Matthew Burton
 
How aware are you of the language you use to narrate your story?
 
Do you know how self-destructive it can be both in the short and the long term when you don’t use resourceful language to communicate with yourself and others?
 
The “I will try”, “I’ll start tomorrow”, “when the circumstances change” kinda stories you’re telling yourself, are stopping you from taking useful action.
 

There are many causes of procrastination, some of which are:

🔸Perfectionism
🔸Fear of failure
🔸Poor time management
🔸Low self-esteem
🔸Low motivation
🔸Lack of direction
🔸Low self confidence
🔸Lack of knowledge
🔸Disconnection from self & others

 

What do you do when you want to create better habits to guide you in a positive, future focused direction?

🔹Understanding the language you use and how procrastination shows up for you are a good place to start.
🔹Getting someone to walk alongside you as you narrate a more beautiful story is another great starting point.

 
Even the most capable professionals and sports people have blind spots and benefit from working with a coach.  So next time you catch yourself saying ‘I’ll try” remember what Yoda said!  
 
Do, or do not…  There’s no try
 
If you’re curious and want to know more, give me a call.
 
 
Love & Strong Coffee
 
Vafa
Allow space to reflect

Allow space to reflect

Allow space to reflect

 
 
“Between stimulus and response there is a space.  In that space is our power to choose our response.  In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”  Viktor Frankl
 
 
I often ask my clients to
✨ Stop
✨ Breathe
✨ Connect to their body
✨ Reflect
✨ Respond or evaluate!
 
 
So, this afternoon as I allow space to reflect and evaluate whilst working in my garden, I’m treating myself to a mini-version of the afternoon tea I so often took for granted BC (Before Covid).
 
 
On this beautiful Friday afternoon I’m grateful for the courageous steps I took to an uncertain world. “What’s the worse that could happen” was the mantra that kept me focused.
 
 
I’m also grateful for the team that supported me in my hour of need; although not always the ones I had counted on, but that’s how we get to know who our real friends are!
 

So, why write this post?

This post was inspired by listening to the radio interview I had with the lovely Zeenat Noorani in which I spoke about my Personal Revolution journey.  
 
 
Realising what I have now, seemed like a dream 5 years ago.  It is about looking back, only to see, and be grateful for how far I’ve come.
 
 
It’s purely to encourage and inspire those of you who are feeling ‘lost, numb, stuck, demotivated, unloved, lonely or whatever definition you give to a sense of stagnation and unfulfillment’ to spring into action.  Those of you who need a different path, or a new perspective.
 
 
If I could do it, so can you!  There’s a huge amount of value in giving yourself the permission to allow space to reflect.  That’s when you can connect with yourself and make a genuine inquiry as to what it is you want out of life.  That’s when you get a chance to be creative and dream…
 
 
It’s good to have a dream. How are you going to make that dream come true? How will you get to live the life you want and deserve? Who’s got your back?
 
 
Call me if you need listening ears ✨
 
 
You only get one life and you deserve to get the life you wish for.  As R. Buckminster Fuller reminds us, “The minute you choose to do what you really want to do, it’s a different kind of life.” 
 
 
Love & Strong Coffee
 
Vafa